Key Points:

1. Avoidance is a pervasive coping mechanism that often worsens discomfort in trading.
2. Grounding exercises can be intentional avoidance, helping you refocus when used correctly.
3. Addressing avoidance starts with the empowering practice of mindfulness and the willingness to face uncomfortable emotions.

This session delves into the destructive nature of avoidance in trading and life, an often overlooked topic. Sean’s insights, drawn from his blog on performance killers, underscore the pervasive influence of avoidance. It’s not just about smoking or over-trading; even seemingly positive actions can be avoidance in disguise. In trading, avoidance can manifest in behaviors like adding to losing positions or moving stop-losses to avoid the discomfort of being wrong.

One of the most profound insights was the distinction between intentional and maladaptive avoidance. For example, grounding techniques, which shift attention away from racing thoughts, can be helpful when used mindfully. However, using these techniques without purpose can become another form of avoidance. Sean explores how even well-intentioned values can be distorted into avoidance tactics when they stem from external pressures rather than authentic personal beliefs.

An SPP community member, Shane, shared his struggle with avoidance after blowing four prop trading accounts in one day. Despite knowing he should log off, he continued trading, driven by greed and the pressure of upcoming personal events. His raw honesty led to a more extensive discussion on acknowledging our mistakes and the importance of defusion, which Sean defines as separating yourself from destructive thoughts rather than getting caught up in them. 

“Even if it makes you feel like a failure, you have to notice the feeling and then throw it in the back of the bus,” Sean says, advocating for mindful acceptance rather than avoidance.

Sean concludes that we all engage in avoidance—sometimes without realizing it. The challenge is building the mental muscle to face discomfort head-on, transforming how we approach trading and life.

C.L.E.A.R. Mindset Connections:

Connect to the present moment and enhance your self-awareness with practical techniques.

• Shane’s example of realizing his avoidance pattern after blowing accounts illustrates the need for ongoing mindfulness in trading.

Loosen your attachment to thoughts and emotions, and cultivate mental clarity and resilience.

• Defusion techniques, such as separating from the shame of failure, help traders regain control over emotional reactions.

Embody your core values and align them with your actions to foster authenticity and purpose.

• Exploring the confusion between values and avoidance leads to a better understanding of how personal beliefs guide trading decisions.

Accept all the present moment offers, whether wanted or not, and find peace and strength.

• True growth in trading and life comes from facing uncomfortable emotions head-on rather than avoiding them. This requires a willingness to experience discomfort and a commitment to genuine growth. It’s not always easy, but the rewards are worth it.

Respond with decisive, informed action, transforming challenges into opportunities for growth.

• Grounding exercises are tools for intentional avoidance, helping traders reset their focus without succumbing to impulsive actions.

Actionable Strategies:

• Proactively identify avoidance triggers by keeping a trading journal of uncomfortable behaviors.
• Embrace minor discomforts daily, such as waiting in long lines or delaying gratification, to build patience.
• Practice defusion techniques when feeling overwhelmed by negative thoughts, labeling them as just thoughts, not facts.
• Incorporate grounding exercises to refocus during stressful trading moments.
• Set and review clear trading rules each day to prevent avoidance-driven decisions.

Act Accordingly:

Avoidance is sneaky—it masquerades as everything from overworking to compulsive acts of kindness. Recognizing and confronting it, whether in trading or life, is critical to unlocking your potential. Practice willingness to face discomfort, use mindfulness to defuse negative thoughts, and make decisions that align with your values. These are the cornerstones of building resilience and achieving success in trading and personal growth.